While I was writing the
previous entry on anger, a theme that I had placed huge emphasis on our lack of
ability in exacting perfect impartial judgement all the time. This theme is
critical in affecting how we cope with the next three emotions I’ll examine in
the subsequent three entries. I have nicknamed them the Tricky Siamese
Triplets, namely envy, pride and greed. Here I’ll briefly explain why I have
classified them together. These three highly negative emotions stem out of the
same root, that of wanting out of comparison, be it with those who have want we
desire (envy), those who have what we think we deserve (pride), and those who
have what we think is more blessings than us (greed). And usually these three
emotions are very difficult to differentiate and divorce from one another,
behaving indeed like co-joined triplets of sorts, and they will often disguise
themselves with the appearance of anger, instead of revealing their true form.
Well, I will attempt to isolate and examine them in three different entries,
starting with envy.
We may question, having a
desire for the good in life, is by itself, no sin, afterall who does not wish
to be blessed. Note that the desire in envy is defined as covetousness, which
are inordinate or wrong desires. “Inordinate” as the word suggests literally,
means that it is “out of the ordinary”, thus meaning the desires have gone out
of control and thus would naturally be wrong. These desires will have
officially mutated into obsessions.
Here I will bring in the
most famous Biblical example of one whose downfall was envy (though I think the
dosage of pride was very high too). King Saul was originally a darling, doing a
good job ruling over Israel. Most people attributed his downfall to begin only
after David appeared and gained momentum with David’s war conquests. However
many do not realise it began way before when David was a factor, and this
occurred during the battle of Gilgal. God had instructed him very clearly
through the prophet Samuel, only to start the battle sacrifice against the
Philistine army. However due to his pride and impatience, he did not wait till
Samuel had arrived for instructions and went ahead instead.
To those who are
bewildered over this act, thinking it is merely a small matter, it is not so
far the deed itself that is the crux of the problem, but the motivation behind
it. Samuel had then declared to Saul harshly, saying “The Lord has sought out a
man after his own heart and appointed him ruler of his people, because you have
not kept the Lord’s command.” (1 Samuel 13:14, NIV). This was further evidenced
in 1 Samuel 15 when he again blatantly disobeyed God’s specific orders with
regards to the battle with the Amakelites. Saul’s pride and impatience were the
glaring indicator that his heart was no longer after God’s, having broken the
very first divine commandment of loving God with all heart, soul and mind. By
the time David appeared, this was glaringly apparent, in that he chose to focus
on the recognition that David was gaining in comparison to himself, instead of urgently
addressing his own lack of devotion to God. This obsession with what David was
bestowed in comparison to himself, ironically was the very thing which
accelerated his eventual demise, losing all he ever had (Read book of 1 Samuel
16 onwards to get a better idea). This is in stark contrast to another less
bleak Old Testament example of King Solomon, who squandered away his early
favour with God during the middle of his reign, but thankfully had the wisdom
to rein himself in and repent in time during his final days, thus not needing
to painfully witness the downfall of his kingdom.
Alright, drama example of
OUAT (again), please bear with me! Since the term is coined “green with envy”,
this character of focus is Zelena, Wicked Witch of the West, sister of Regina.
To be fair, she did suffer abandonment by her mother Cora, snubbing by mentor Rumple
in favour of Regina instead, under-appreciation by the other three Witches of
Oz the moment Dorothy arrives, etc. However, she fails to do herself any
favours by soaking herself up in envy and resentment. There is even a perverted sense that she
actually relishes it, and this is what makes us audience go green inside out. Her
current sole purpose in life is schadenfreude directed towards Regina. Even
though Regina has continuously made it clear to her that most of what she had
been blessed with (title of queen albeit the adjective of evil, fearful
obedience of royal subjects, the glam of the jewels and outfits etc), are not
as marked up to be as Zelena envisioned, she remains stubbornly unconvinced. In
the latest episodes, she had even resorted to stooping to the classic underhanded
soap opera tactic of deceitfully bedding Regina’s boyfriend Robin Hood to get
pregnant (For people not acquainted with OUAT, this is a fantasy drama and not a
conventional family drama, so it is not the typical “making the guy drunk then
go to bed”, though the outcome is still just as torturous for hardcore Outlaw
Queen shippers like me).
When we are caught up in envy
trap, focusing fixatedly on “the grass is always greener on the other side”, we
rarely stop to ask ourselves: Firstly with regard to ourselves, yes even if the
grass is indeed greener on the other side, is the desire of our side really
that of grassfield? Sometimes we may find we may want a beach, a rainforest, a
mountain or a canyon instead, and do not
desire that exact grassfield. This is quite obvious in the OUAT drama in that
Zelena actually has no feelings whatsoever for Robin and neither does she
really want what Regina has in the exact sense. She just cannot bear the
thought of “losing” in her standing in comparison to Regina, such that her
motto is “Wicked always wins”. She has remained oblivious till now that her motivation
behind Regina’s continued misery is a longing for reconciliation with those she
feel have let her down, e.g. Cora and Rumple, which in its purest form is
reasonable.
Next, even if the answer to
the first question is a definite yes, we need to acknowledge the toil and effort
put into the fruition of that grassfield, which their architects rarely bring
to anyone’s attention. No doubt due to differing abilities, tilling that grassfield
may prove a piece of cake to you, but you would also likely then rapidly lose
appreciation for the beauty of it. There is some speculation among OUAT
followers that the baby move will rehab Zelena. Initially I had felt the idea
to be preposterous due to my own biasedness against her, but in retrospect
there may indeed be some warped wisdom behind the scriptwriters’ decision. Motherhood
may actually let Zelena experience firsthand the volatile dynamics that had
existed her mother Cora and her sister Regina, shifting her axis from solely self,
and assisting her in relating to all other parties in the future, especially coming
to terms that Cora and Regina’s lives were as much of a piece of cake as she
thought.
In the recent years, I
have gotten this inkling that possession does not directly equate to
appreciation more and more, but is more akin to fruition. Think of the flowers
in other people’s fields growing so beautifully. When we get so fixated to
possess the beauty of that bloom and we pluck it off, we actually kill it as it
is no longer in the vine. Meanwhile, those seeds which we have been assigned in
life, have sowed in our field and toiled over so much weeding and watering laboriously,
may seem so cruelly barren at the moment. However it is because we have experienced
this hardship, once the first sprout emerges from the soil, our rejoicing will
know no bounds. Now that is green beauty!
Resentment kills a fool,
and envy slays
the simple.
Job 5:2 (NIV)
A heart at peace gives
life to the body, but envy rots the bones.
Proverbs 14:30 (NIV)
