Word Play 9: 骂人法则123

今天又在做工时被气坏了，甚至气得没能力喘口气。Literally angry till out of breath, such that during the entire incident, I was unable to reply anything else other than "I did not XYZ." Thankfully now I'm back in front of my computer again, catching my breath back, together with a prescription of TCM medication from 中华 Free Clinic to 降火, as it seems like I'm suffering from a bout of physical heatiness too.

I was reflecting on today's incident, which led me to wonder about the concept of scolding, aka 骂人. Being drained as I am of energy now, I have no intention of scolding anyone, especially on today (Holy Thursday, eve of Good Friday). Simply pondering over a common phrase which many blurt out in heated moments, the “你去死啊！” or "You go and die/f*** yourself!"

For most scenarios, this phrase serves no concrete purpose, to both the one scolding and the one being scolded. Let me go explain it from both sides.

1. The one scolding

This scolding is actually a half complete sentence, the full version being “我要你去死啊！” or "I want you to go and die/f*** yourself!" However, now think upon it, what specific action verb applies for the “我” or "I" in this sentence... Sad to say, nothing at all. In fact, the action verb that applies to “我” or "I" here is merely “要” or "want". Wants are merely desires, some attainable within our capacity, some mission impossible. In the context of this phrase, I think the chances of us attaining what we desire when we blurt out the phrase are very very slim indeed...

2. The one being scolded

When the interchange of words has come to this extent, it no longer deserves being classified as mere feedback. Thus, the receptivity of the one being scolded is definitely not very high. Even under any circumstances, the receptivity of anybody to the phrase would be zilch. If I were the one being verbally whacked by this phrase but being in a calm mood, I'd remark to myself how hilarious the phrase is, as the one scolding me is totally helpless at substantiating what grounds am I to oblige and accede to this request. Tsk, tsk. :p

I've indulged in inward cursing of this sort often, but now I've realised the futility of it. Not that scolding is fruitless. In fact, it was through the harsh scoldings by many mentors, was I able to get rid of many bad habits and mindsets of mine.

During silent retreat last week, a constant point that God had wanted me to consider properly was what I wanted for myself. Applying it to the context of scoldings and quarrels in heated moments, I think the best method to scold would be to ensure that the “我” or "I" has a specific action verb. All else is actually secondary. Thus, next time I'll curse inwardly “你这TMD王八蛋！我更要活得好好的！” or "I'll survive and prosper all the more, as you're such an arsehole!"

Word Play 6: How big is your vessel, how asthmatic are you?

I was just chatting with a gal pal over the past weeks about our embroilment within office politics in our respective workplaces. When she had gotten into in-depth description of the villain at her end, who critiqued her for her cockiness, I had said the line “At least it takes talent, ability and capacity to be proud and arrogant. Meanwhile pettiness requires none of these at all. Anyone can pull it off.” She had burst out laughing in return, clearly enjoying this line. Now I’d like to look into the word “pettiness”, though I’ll not look it up from dictionary.com, but examine its Chinese translations instead… :p

The Chinese translation for pettiness is 小气 or 小器. The first one’s literal translation means “short of breath” or “asthmatic ”; while the other’s translation means “small vessel” or “small capacity”. Whichever way, pettiness is completely devoid of stamina, talent, ability or capacity. Anyone big or small, healthy or not, can pull it off with minimal effort.

Among all the seven sins, perhaps envy is the one most akin to pettiness. Envy stems from comparison of how minute, unblessed one is, relative to others. If David had held on to a “pettiness logic” mindset, Goliath would never have been defeated. Maybe when we view talent, ability, stamina and capacity, we should no longer use the worldly dimensions of quantity, length, breath, and width, we have been so accustomed to.

During last Oct when I was most tested of my ability and stamina in the workplace, a sagely concerned colleague had remarked that he noticed how out of breath and labourious my breathing had become, expressing worry over my health. This problem has left me now I’ve tided through that period. However, I’m not taking any chances and have actually signed up for a 太极 class at a community centre, to exercise particularly pertaining to regulating of my breathing. I believe this would help me greatly not only in my physical health, but also my emotional and spiritual health. God will mould the spiritual clay of my physical, emotional clay of my lungs to increase their size. Thus, I’d also like to call upon everyone to also increase your capacity for breathing, literally and figuratively in our lives. Happy breathing while living! :)