Love vs. Like

Hi,

Today's topic will be more of a girls' night topics so if you're a guy, be warned! :P
Was out with a group of non-believer friends, who I'm very close to, celebrating one of their birthday. As in the group, many of them were already hitched, engaged or in a relationship, our conversations quickly delved into that of the "Hey, this guy that used to xxx is now yyy."; "Luckily I swore off guys from the year 19xx" type.
Frankly, I admit that I REALLY HATED this kind of gal outings. They had this nagging reminder effect that, sad to say, there was no guy in physical form around me with substantial feelings for apart from my dad... :P
Thank God, tonight I was able to appreciate the humour from the topic, though I still maintained the position of more of an interested listener with little participation, for fear that my comments would spoil the entire mood. Proves that this decision was indeed a wise one given from God.
On the way home I reflected on the definition of "love" and "like".

Actually the week before, I just had this argument with a guy that I was having a "tug-of-war"ish relationship, ever since my JC years. The two of us always seems to be having this "timing difference", a term which I now dread as I'm doing book-balancing in Finance... :P
Whenever he was ready and enthusiatic, I wasn't and vice versa. Happens that as of late last year, I was warming up again, whereas he was cooling off. Then last monday, after the two of us chatted on his recent plans, I lost control over jealously of a girl he is now interested in. For the past week I was the whiny brat, questioning the "why oh why"s and moaning the "he's a jerk". (Part of my bad mood mentioned in the previous blog is attributed to this). Anyway, thankfully God gave me the optical test already on saturday morning so the very first word I've come to examine with this new pair of God's spectacles is LOVE.
Whenever we think of "love", the most common association is that of the romantic type. There are also other types of love, i.e. filial piety, brotherhood (sisterhood), friendship, etc... Too many to list all.
However these secular definitions of love are often built on a "Me" & "the other party/parties" relationship. God is missing in the picture.
What then happens? As I said in the previous blog, both the "Me" and "The other party" are ever-changing and thus unstable, thus this relationship will be shaky.
Not that there are no success stories of relationships of love without God in the picture... At least we can't be definitely sure. Even those success stories actually do have the work of God in them, just that the parties involved don't know until the day they meet God.
If we look to the Bible, God tells us in John 13:34 that our love for others, should be the way we love him...
Well, in retrospect, then I am really very ashamed lah... My relationship towards God has been so lukewarm in the past quarter that the danger of me backsliding was all along at my doorstep, just that I didn't see... If I didn't love God, whose love for me has been there always, how could what I feel for this guy, be love?
Going further, I think my feelings towards this guy is, yes, positive, but more of the "I like him" not "I love him".
Liking something/someone lacks the passion, enthusiasm determination and calling of loving something/someone.
Thanksfully God revealed this point to me today. Amen!

To the guy: Hey, I still like you but don't worry lah, I got much much more important things to do. I got the best lover now. Just that I must make sure I keep sight of the fact that he's around. :P

Things to thank my lover, :P, for:
1. For a great gals night...Though all the other gals didn't realise my Holy Spirit boyfriend was beside me throughout the night! :P
2. Attended a great service this morning at church. Though I don't exactly agree with all the points in the sermon, what the pastor preached is still very godly, and the topic touched on today was on how, we being loved my God, love those around us, even those who are undeserving (Read 2 Samuel on David and Mephiboseth).
3. Attended a interesting seminar this afternoon at church on Depression by Dr Leslie Lim. Though I had some nagging thought that I suffer from depression, turns out I don't. My situation is more of the "going through challenges in life" scenario. The seminar has equipped me with knowledge to apply on how to deal with depression should it ever start arising in me or those around me.
4. Bought a 3CDs worship CD at great discount! (Holy Spirit was nagging at my ears then to spend within my means and NOT splurge!)

Prayer to those who I am trying to really love:
1. My mum and dad. No need to say too much. God bless them.
2. Wenlin and Wenzhen. Wenlin, thanks for letting the Holy spirit manifest in you on saturday to give me that overdue scolding. May you recover from your injury soon. I want to sign on your cast! Wenzhen, don't really know how to communicate with you, so just, God bless.
3. Wen Ting, yo! Thanks for bothering to accompany me for last night's movie. Great show man! Though must apologise that I almost had a debate with you over the interpretation of the movie.
4. Tenacious and SITS members. Hey, sorry that I still seem quite aloof sometimes but thanks for always trying to understand.
5. The colleagues in my workplace, those whom I like, neutral, and even dislike. God bless you all for his kingdom. With love serve one another. ;)
6. My pre-believer friends. God bless you all and I hope one day you will come to realise your blessings are from Him!
7. And finally, the guy. Eh, I still like you leh, so how? Boh pian loh. God bless you so that you will love those that He has set for you to love. Btw, if The Gal is from God, she will definitely love you if you love her. Trust God ah, not me. :P

John 13:34 "As I have loved you, you must love one another."

The God-sight test

This past few months haven't been easy. Wasn't exactly sure of what had gone through both my heart and mind until God's eye-sight test gave a a "shock". Was having a routine morning breakfast talk with my sister when I started to degenrate into the complaining mode again. She, then began rebuking me. What could have been a constructive session broke out into a major quarrel the 2 of us had since quite some time ago. Both of us then retreated to our domains later.
While that moment when I was struggling with whether to let it out by crying and wondering whether I was crying due to self-pity or for my sister, then I heard the Holy Spirit asking the question "Why are you so concerned over what others think?"
It's not that I have never thought of this issue before. Its just that finally in that moment it struck. Suddenly it all made sense. I poured out to God, apologising for how I had been worshipping others around me, instead of Him.
Previously I had always thought the problem with my faith in God was due to self-worship (worshipping of self over God). Turns out I wasn't completely wrong but I had failed to see a crucial and critical point. My perception of self had been constructed based on what others feel, think about me. And as we know, others' perceptions of you are always changing. They will never be stable. That was precisely why I had been going through the rollercoaster of up, down and plateau-riding in mixed combis.
The great thing is that then I realised no matter what happens: God's perception of you NEVER changes. We are always his sheep and he will always love us no matter what. I had placed my base on what others think/view/see about me. As this base always changes, of course the building is unstable and will collapse.
Now that I finally gotten my new spectacles from God, I'll get to building the correct base immediately.
Today's blog is dedicated to all around me who matter so much to me (family, friends, colleagues, that jerk who I can't get over, even those who I just don't see eye to eye), but most of it is dedicated to Him because I always matter to Him no matter what. Hallelujah!

Thing to praise for:
1. Watching late night movie "Inception" later.
2. Going for gym later in afternoon
3. An interesting news article analysis on mega-churches in ST this morning
4. The quarrel with my sister
5. The Holy Spirit for giving me this eye-sight test. Really, its been way overdue. Thanks for it happening!

Deuteronomy 31:6
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave nor forsake you.

John 14: 1,18
"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Turst in God; trust also in me."

2 Corinthians 6:18
"I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters", says the Lord Almighty.

A Frank Prologue

Hi,

I'll like to be frank to all who read my blog. I do value my relationship with Jesus Christ very much, but sometimes, especially in times like now, I whine. If you wish to read inspiring messages everday, sorry to say but I'm a wet blanket. The purpose of this blog is more to be like the Israelites, who cried out to God when in times of distress. So the style of writing in this blog is a bit like some of the "complaining" psalms. :P
Of course, as a close friend and fellow follower told me, you MUST remember to count the blessings that God has bestowed upon you everyday, so I'll definitely include in my daily thanksgiving to Him, not as an obligation, but as a reminder that what I really can't comprehend/value now, will be a great treasure to me when I look back in this blog later.
I would love to hear feedback from all, be they fellow mates in Christ because another aim of this blog is to let fellow mates in Christ who are wavering in faith, whiny, and/or complaining know that they are not they only ones with these issues! :) However, I do NOT wish to complain forever. I hope that these issues / complaints I bring up lead to constructive discussion and eventually strengthens our love and faith in Him.
Also I value views from non-believers too. However, try to be polite and respectful of us followers of Christ.
There! My 1st complaint blog to God is out. Hallelujah!

Thanksgiving for the day:
1. Finally having the courage to set up this blog.
2. Not needing to withdraw $ from the ATM as I have enough cash to sustain me until at least fri?
3. Managing to get to my office in time, in fact 5 minutes before work.
4. Finally having the discipline to attend BSF after so long. Been pon-taning too much.
5. Able to speak coherently to the auditors when questioned regarding work process
6. Having a cheap dinner