I have been trying to put off writing my thoughts for a quite a while (see the post on 20 Feb). However I have come across a quote by Elena Ferrante about how there should not be any need to contain our thoughts and feelings in our private spaces, and it is perhaps most appropriate for this post to be a movie which lays bare the uncomfortable thoughts and feelings of parties involved in an infamous sport scandal, "I Tonya".
The film is shot in a manner where we are asked to suspend our loyalties and preferences towards and against any of the characters first, and scrutinise the events from different perspectives of each character. What we are presented with is a series of mistake upon mistake culminating into an ultimate catastrophic finale, despite what had seemed so full of potential and promise.
Yet in life who has never made any mistakes, and how many of us ever do know of its full gravity? We are always trying to do our best as Tonya Harding did, regardless of whatever rules or conventions bind us. These rules and conventions may be harsh and merciless, yet they have their place and necessity. Which is why I agree with the final verdict of lifetime ban of Tonya Harding from figure skating, as the issue is not merely about her rivalry with Nancy Kerrigan, or that particular year's Winter Olympics, but about how the mistakes have led to a sacrilege of sportsmanship.
There are also other issues that I think of with regard to this film. Firstly, is life or truth always so clear-cut in a black versus white, Harding-Kerrigan narrative? What if in life we do not have such a fixed identity but actually alternate between the roles of Tonya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan constantly? In fact it is very clear from the film, that Tonya Harding views herself as the "Nancy Kerrigan" of the unfortunate incident. If so, how do we put a decisive end to this sequence of unfortunate events, where we release everyone from the bondage of this Harding-Kerrigan narrative?
The film does not end with any answers to those questions, and it seems that is the exact intent of the film. Life's narrative is supposed to be complicated and messy, and we will always find ourselves thrust to and fro into the discomforting throes of the Harding-Kerrigan narrative.
For those who are interested in finding more about the theory of the Harding-Kerrigan Narrative this is a fantastic introduction.
